Monday, July 13, 2015

Inner Tattoos...


Yesterday
I had coffee & dessert
with my dear friend Laurice.
We hadn't caught up since
my 30th Birthday party
(back in 1998).

I told her about my recent
experience of mutual love.
She (unlike so many other
               so-called friends)
got it.

Perhaps
because we have known
each other for so long?
Or perhaps
because she is another poet?
Or that she has three daughters???

We agreed that over time
the brain forgets,
but not the heart
A tiny layer of scar tissue
might help with the healing.

But what the brain forgets,
we shall write it down! Capture it!!
And through
the act of writing down
(what us writers do)...

...We shall not forget.

And at that point
(not that my memory should be trusted)
Laurice quoted Buddha to me.
Or perhaps it was from Laurice?
They're (both)
much older & wiser
than I...

"Everything is already over
  as soon as it begins."

It made me feel a little better.
The chocolate mousse helped, too. 
Actually, it helped
a lot.



****



Once,
not that long ago:
I looked forward to sleeping...
...So I could (perhaps, if I were lucky enough)
see you again
in my dreams.

Now, I would gladly settle
for one full night
of uninterrupted sleep. 

Exhaustion & fatigue are setting in,
starting to take their toll.

You're out of sight, out of frame /
but I have a feeling you still hear my voice
when I whisper your name.

Did you know (or even care)
that when you drew your secret / sacred logo
on my chest (in Sharpie),
it would seep through chest & skin:
Stain my heart forever?

And from time to time /
do you still feel the tiny butterfly that I sketched
on the base of your perfect spine??

We were more than just lovers,
we were two lovers of words /
When I close my eyes to dream now,
they're filled with tattoos of birds.

My heart it was always on my sleeve,
but since that third morning when we kissed /
I'm seriously considering
having it tattooed upon my wrist.

"Everything is already over
  as soon as it begins."

And do I really need to remind you
that I never planned any of this /
From the lowest of lows
to the sweetest tasting bliss?

No. More. Secrets.
Your books are in the mail.
And some drawings for your nieces & nephew,
because I am a man of my word.

For what it is worth:
It really meant the world to me
that you noticed the new feather in my hat.

Hit pause and rewind / God,
I miss your mind!

Sometimes,
it's so much harder to hide /
the tattoos we all wear
on the inside. 

Yes! Sometimes,
my friend
it's so much
harder to hide /

the tattoos we wear

on
the
inside.
 


(c) Brent Harpur 2015. 

"The way is not in the sky. The way is in the heart." (Buddha)

"And pipes, they may break & milk may go sour / I'm still waking with aches in early morning hours." (Grant McLennan)





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